Doctors’ Office Signs

Specialists are really picky about the questions they’ll entertain during an office visit today. Here’s a conversation I overheard between patients.

A: Did you know there are now signs up in some doctors’ offices that say “Only questions regarding the ______ will be addressed?”
B: You’re kidding!
A: No, I’m not.
B: Who fills in the blank?
A: The doctor who’s in.
B: Is there a little flip chart thingy listing different body parts behind the blank to make it easy for different doctors to change the sign?
A: No, there’s no flip chart thingy. The doctor who is in simply puts up his specialty.
B: That’s pretty funny. How specific are these signs? I mean imagine signs like ‘Today only questions about the bleep will be addressed.’
A: Do you think that might help the doc get a date with a hot patient?
B: Or maybe the sign could get surreptitiously technical to intimidate patients against asking questions in the first place. Something like ‘Today, only questions regarding (insert obscure technical jargon) will be addressed.’
A: Hey, maybe you could have stickers made up, and when the coast is clear, sneak one on the sign nonchalantly?
B: Maybe we could market those electronic Times Square ticker signs to docs to make it easy to change messages.
A: Hey, with so little time to communicate, you’ve got to be innovative!
-Doctorblue